14082004

Can i really love anymore? Does mutual love truly exist? Perhaps most people get plagued by questions like this some point in their life, and for me, it's one time too many. my fourth relationship. fourth. ended just 4 months and 5 days after it started... The first one lasted 3 years, the second, one and half third, two years, and this one... but then again, it was my fault for going on a kinda rebound cause my heart was shattered. selfish jerk. the chinese have a saying that bad things don't come alone, and true as that adage is, i was stopped from being promoted, and stopped from going to iraq. both opportunities of a lifetime. then again, life has been more than fair to me in many other ways, so who am I to complain? Less a few break ups and hicc-ups, life's been a breeze so far. it flew by me so fast tt i'm 20 this year. no longer a teen in 3 months and 5 days. but one irony is tt they don't allow us 20 year olds to make our own life choices as we're not fully adults, but they expect us to be fully aware of our decisions and actions, and will not hesitate to convict us if we make a mistake. hmmm maybe it isn't an irony. maybe i'm just unhappy about not being able to be in full control of my life. but heck it, in a few years i'll be longing for that shelter and protection that was was omnipresent in my life.